4 Years Ago Today
FRIDAY 15th MAY 2020…. No football, no pubs open, can’t meet mates, not sure whether it’s safe to go out…….oh for this day 4 years ago
SUNDAY 15th MAY 2016…… Secured a 10th consecutive season in the Premiership, sun shining, sent the Mags down, off to Watford beach for a proper party!
Whilst the idiots up the road, (they’ve never won anything on colour TV), have an unhealthy obsession with us, sending them down was rather good. We headed to Watford full of joy.
Celebrating survival is a funny one,I get the argument that it’s nothing to celebrate, (especially when it’s the 4th year in a row?) – but this was different, we had Big Sam, even with the squad as it was now, we’d be in the top 10. For once supporting Sunderland was going to be great for a few years……
As we know, David Moyes arrived to suck the life out of what should have been an exciting, competitive squad. The day in Watford was mint though…. never has an entire support been so united- even missing the first 15 minutes due to inept entry procedures didn’t dampen the spirits of SAFCBlog…..
No obligation to read the poem, but if you do, it’s best read as fast as you can!
“ONE DAY IN WATFORD”
……..”Benítez, Beneath us, Mags Down, Ginger piss biscuit a clown, see you later, fat Spanish waiter, Wetherspoons, full of loons, palm trees, dirty knees, channel 4, Mags trapdoor, 2-2, NE1 fuck you, get pissed, 2 goals missed, season 10 in the prem, and we relegated them, live the dream, a love supreme, Leamington Spa, in a car, staying up, Sam will win a cup, Elton John he can sing, not really my thing, …..Kone Khazri, dour Dave will ruin thee, Kirchhoff, soon be off, Moyes nightmare, hurts when you care, down we go, Moyes shit show, new beginning, every week we’ll soon be winning, down again, further pain….no fairytale ending, lazy Rodwell trending……. Alice in Wonderland it’s not, malice in Sunderland we got”
On the off chance anyone is still reading, here’s my account of the day……
So, after a very decent weds night at the SOL, when we put, (an admittedly hapless), Everton to the sword…. I’m sure it will crop up on a lot of people’s best games? We all have our SAFC memories, for all sorts of reasons… but what a night?
Shared with special friends and more so my beloved dad, (it was great), the 4 day period of Defoe demolishing Chelsea and the 3~0 vs Everton were just perfect; family always comes first…. but fucking hell; football ticks an awful lot of boxes! Only wish is the bearded fool would have been with us; but we’ll definitely make up for it… in the words of my favourite Bradford based photocopier salesman …… “look forward, not back and always keep smiling”
So, we’ve sent the mags led by a fat Spanish waiter down to the Abyss of the Championship, (imagine going that low eh?), and we have a trip to Watford that is effectively a party, yes ….. we are on the beach…… now there’s a thought???
Upon arrival in a car park in Watford, our man at the wheel, (Harold Bishop), says he has something to tell us……… in summary….
……Pete Brandon will meet us shortly, as he has 2 girls hidden in his car, who have been hiding overnight at his gaff in London, who are taking part in the Channel 4 show Hunted, our driver had met them at the car wash the other day in a garden centre in York, Harold Bishop has agreed to hide said girls for the day and take them wherever they need to go…. all pretty straight forward???
Given our destination is Watford Weatherspoon’s followed by a Premier League game and a dirty kebab shop, whilst dressed in beach clothes ~ it is decided we might not be overly “discreet?”. Fear not ~ it’s agreed the girls will hide in the boot whilst we go to the game!
Back to car, pissed, sign a load of paperwork with channel 4 media types, (they look a bit concerned!), and head to secret venue where the Hunted Girls have somewhere to stay….. Leamington Spa!! No idea where that is ~ but it didn’t seem to be between Watford and Harrogate? Bizarre journey as Channel 4 media car follows and we have a Go Pro fitted to record us! Don’t watch TV … but apparently the show is a ‘survival exercise?’ ~ we survived on peroni and pork pies, (sponsorship opportunities available ~ contact the media team at email@example.com)
Long story short, (ish), leave girls and media crew at Leamington Spa gaff, after a fraught exchange. To be fair, if pissed bloke in a sombrero knocked on my door, saying he has 2 girls to hide in your house, and your landlord, (who’s on holiday), says it’s ok….I’d perhaps have reservations??
Despite the Go Pro recording a couple of hours of intellectual chat…. none of it made it to the airwaves! Bizarre??
After a 3 hour detour, we head north.
Tomorrow….. more cutting edge journalism
2/4 ~ SAFCBlog kidnap a Match of the Day commentator……..
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